How to Help a Child Deal with the Death of a Loved One

"When someone you love dies,

You never quite get over it.

You just slowly learn,

How to go without them.

But always keeping them,

Tucked safely in your heart."

It is very difficult for a child to cope up with the recent death of someone he loved. The death of his loved one confuses and hurts them and makes them go into a shell. They actually wonder what it is all about as they don't understand what is happening around? Whenever there is a death in the family of our near and dear ones  we exclude children from the funeral. The whole process of death or dying makes us vulnerable. So just imagine what a child must be going through! Bewildered and totally confused of what is going around, children usually try to seek answers from their elders. And when they don't get these answers for their questions they get wrong notions about the whole dying process.

When death occurs within a family, a child is usually kept away from the process. We take care that we avoid discussions pertaining to death be withheld in front of our children. Either we try to change the topic or we send them to their rooms. Often kids are sent away until the funeral process is completed. Kids are not invited to the funeral and everything is concealed in euphemism and secrecy.

But have we ever wondered what all this secrecy and concealment does to a child. The sudden disappearance of his favorite person add to his dilemma. Now this death could be of anyone, one of his parents, grandparents, siblings,uncle, aunt or even a close friend. Someone very near and dear to him or her whom they see everyday and would not be seeing anymore. This could really be devastating to a child. The whole concealment would further worsen up the matter.

How to help a Child Deal with the Death of a Loved One

Let Your Child Pour Out To You

Try and understand what your child is going through. It is important that a child pours out his feelings and his confusions. Try to talk to him. This will definitely relax his mind and help him feel better.

Have One to One Conversation

It is very important that you and your child have a fair conversation. He has to be told and not to be kept in any darkness. A child has to know what is going on in the house and he is also part of it. Answer his questions fully without divulging deep details.

Let Him Know It is Okay to Remember

Assure the child that even though his favorite person won't be around anymore, it is still okay if he misses them or tries to remember them. 

Let Him Say Good Bye

Let your child participate in the funeral process. Experts have maintained that when a child is allowed to involve in the process of death, he or she copes better. Let the child be allowed to share his or her favorite memory with the person, in front of everyone. He could even sing a farewell song or a good bye song if he wishes.

Let Him Know the Cause of Death

The child should be made aware of the cause of death, but not in exact terms. The child could be told that the person who died, his death was due to some illness or old age or accident. Merely saying being sick can make a child fear sickness as if, "Oh, I have fear, I am sick and I am going to die"!

Alive In Memories

If the person who passed away had a special bond or connection with the child, assure him that the connection would always remain that way. Don't ask him to try to forget this person.  Let the child know that it is okay to always keep the dead person alive in his memories. Allow the child to keep a memento like a picture or a thing belonged to the person who passed away. 

It would take a little time, as they say 'Time heals all wounds'. As days would pass, your child would start feeling better. We need to give them some time to recover. Always be close by and try to spend some time with them. Try to engage them in activities they enjoy. This would act as a distraction and could help your child to deal with the death of his loved one. 

Tales of Tenali Raman - Tenali Raman and The Thieves

In the Kingdom of Vijaynagar, a band of thieves where known to cause enough trouble to the people, especially the rich merchants. The guards of King Krishnadevaraya tried their best to catch them, but they remained fruitless. The thieves used to search for a rich merchant and then loot his house and get away with it.

These thieves have been constantly observing Tenali Raman. They were aware of the fact that Tenali Raman was handsomely rewarded by the king very often. Looting his house was going to be an excellent opportunity. But what the thieves were unaware was that Tenali usually distributed all the gifts and rewards among the poor.

So one night the thieves seek the opportunity of robbing Tenali Raman. They came to his house one night and hid behind the bushes. But Tenali Raman had already seen them hiding. Being clever, he knew how to handle this situation. He went to the nearby window and started speaking loudly to his wife, "My dear wife, I have been hearing a lot about these thieves who loot rich people at night. I have an idea of saving our valuable treasures. Why don't we put all our wealth in this big trunk and hide it in some secret location." His wife asked, "Where do you plan to hide it?" To this Tenali Raman said," Come with me, I will show you."

Tenali Raman put some big stones in the trunk and closed it. Then he dragged the trunk and brought it behind his house. He pushed the trunk into the big well and went inside the house with his wife. The thieves meanwhile were witnessing the whole episode. They were very happy that they knew the secret place where Tenali Raman had hidden the valuables. The trunk indeed looked very heavy when Tenali Raman was dragging it. So they waited patiently behind the bushes allowing the family of Tenali Raman to sleep. Then they went near the well and examined it. It was indeed a big well and full of water. The only way, they realized, to remove the trunk out was to empty the water from the well. So they started drawing out water from the well.

Meanwhile Tenali Raman had managed to come out of the house and hide himself outside. He had heard all the plans the thieves were making. He saw the thieves drawing out water. He realized he had not watered the plants in a while. So an idea came to him. Without the thieves' notice he tried making small channels in the ground with the help of a shovel. The thieves did not notice him as they were busy drawing out water. They kept throwing water on the ground which through the different channels made by Tenali started flowing towards the garden. By this simple act, the water wasn't wasted and the plants were watered well. This went on for sometime.

 The well being big, the thieves got tired after a while. They stopped and sat near the well and discussed about their plans. Meanwhile Tenali had asked his son to fetch the guards. The guards surrounded the thieves and captured each one of them. The thieves were too tired to protest or run.

In the king's court the next day, the thieves were brought before the king. The king summoned the thieves to prison. The king was impressed with Tenali Raman's bravery and presence of mind.

How to Write a Good Essay

Not everybody is born to write a good essay! I must say, some possess born talent to write good, engaging essays. But that does not mean those who do not possess such skills, cannot acquire them to pen down good essay. To write a good essay one must do some preparation, and mind you this preparation has to be done even by those who possess natural talents. Once the basic preparation is done, then as soon as you start writing an essay the flow of thoughts pour down sequentially and thus a good essay materialises.

How to write a Good Essay

Get a Clear Idea about the Subject of Essay

Before writing an essay, it is important to get a clear idea about the subject of the essay you are attempting to write. It is important that there is no misunderstanding about the meaning of the topic that is been selected by you to write the essay. Select topic on the basis of your knowledge about it. If a topic is not understood well, then the essay that you plan to write would go all wrong and you may just end up writing something irrelevant to the topic.

Jot Down Points

Now as soon as you have understood the topic, start writing down all the points that flash through your mind related to the topic. When we think of a subject to write down on an essay, we automatically start thinking about various points pertaining to essay, but if we don't jot down those points immediately, we may just forget few of those when we actually start writing an essay. These points could be anything pertaining to the topic, for example, if you plan to write an essay on Discipline, then points such as success, values of discipline, hard work, achieving goals etc would flash through your mind and you would want to discuss these points in the essay. So it is important that you jot down these points on a side of your paper or a notepad.

Arrange the Points in Order

Now that you have a clear idea about the subject of the essay, and few points are being jotted down by you pertaining to the subject, start adding a proper sequence to these points. Try to arrange these points in proper order, so as to where and when you wish to include these points and discuss about them. Try and make an arrangement in such a manner that it helps you grasp the attention of your reader.

Make a Good Introduction

Once the points are in order, see that you make a good start. The way an essay opens up to the reader is very important for his further engagement. If a essay starts out in a dull fashion, then there are chances that the reader would assume that the essay is just boring and would not even skip out the rest of the content. The introduction of an essay should be attractive yet slightly brief. It is important to make a good introduction if you plan to write a good essay. The introduction should include  brief explanation about the way you treat the subject. Starting with a proverb, a saying, a quotation, an incident or even a small story can work wonders to your introduction part of the essay.

Stick to the Topic

Throughout the essay, while penning down your thoughts and ideas see that you stick to the topic. Don't try to stray away from the subject and confuse the reader. Whenever writing an essay on a particular topic never include ideas or thoughts which are not related to the subject.

Don't be Repetitive

The most boring aspect for a reader while reading an essay is the repetition. While reading an essay reading the same thoughts or sentiments again and again throughout the essay are not welcome. Make sure that while connecting the points or discussions in an essay you do not repeat sentiments or expressions or even use the same key word over and over again.

Avoid Usage of Short Forms

Short forms such as won't. shan't, don't, shouldn't etc should be avoided including in an essay. Try and avoid using numerals too in an essay. They portray an essay in a bad form. A use of abbreviations such as e.g., etc, should be avoided, instead use full forms like for example, so on and on.

Use the Same Tense Sequence

This is one of the key rule one should definitely follow while writing an essay. Suppose if you have started writing an essay in past tense, then you should continue the essay throughout in past tense. The whole essay should be written in a same sequence of tenses.

Be Simple and Precise

Instead of using complex sentences, which if not used carefully may destroy the whole essence of your essay; it is advisable to go simple. Try using simple words and sentences in your essay. Try to be direct and precise. Try not to be tempted in using complex or big words just for the sake of impressing the examiners or readers.

Express Yourself

Writing essay is all about expressing yourself. One important rule about writing a good essay is that you write it on the basis of your knowledge and imagination. When you write an essay try and express yourself. Let the reader know your genuine feelings and experiences. This helps readers to connect with you and enjoy your essay.

Reserve the Best for the Last

As much as an introduction is pivotal for penning down a good essay, the conclusion of an essay also holds a great importance. What has been started by you in a beautiful manner has to conclude in the similar impact. The conclusion of a good essay should be interesting and powerful. A dull and boring conclusion would spoil the whole show. It should sum up the arguments included in the essay and should prove that you made a valid point. It is necessary that all the arguments or discussions made in the essay are concluded with a strong view point. A inclusion of striking paraphrase or a quotation might be interesting.

Once you get through all these points and understand what and how to write, there is no stopping you. Just go ahead and pour out your thoughts and knowledge over an topic you know you could write a good essay about.

Essay - Is Studying Grammar Better than Practicing Conversation

Studying Grammar is definitely better than practicing conversation. As all know that language is the most effective means of communication and the ability of people to talk is one of the skills that makes human way different from the rest of the animal world. Animals have simple language to communicate as in few of the noises they make. But on the other hand, human are known to speak many languages throughout the world.

Practicing conversation could be very easy, all one has to know words and speak or write them. But knowing words alone does not suffice . Each and every word has to be put in a definite order so that they make sense when spoken, and this is where grammar plays its role. Grammar teaches us to use words in proper punctuation and sequence which provides complete justice to the conversation we are having. 

People who plan to govern the language by practicing conversation without studying grammar fail miserably in their efforts to communicate with others. In turn during such conversations such people can be misunderstood more often. By doing so they make a complete fool of themselves with their lack of knowledge of Grammar. But on the other hand a person who has studied grammar and uses it effortlessly in his conversation can make an impression on to his listeners. Such person stands out in the crowd and gains success with his remarkable communication skills.

Tales of Tenali Raman - Tenali Raman and Goddess Kali's Blessing

Once upon a time in a small village called Tenali in the state Karnataka, there lived a young boy named Ramakrishna who was great devotee of Kalika Devi. Ramakrishna used to worship the goddess daily at the village temple.

So one afternoon when Ramakrishna was offering his prayers at the temple, a sage passed by. The sage saw a young boy praying the goddess and was impressed with his devotion. He came to the young lad and enquired whether he visited the temple daily. The young lad answered yes.

On listening his answer the sage asked Ramakrishna, " Do you young lad, worship her daily without fail ?" To this the lad answered, " Yes, I do worship her daily without fail."

So the sage out of curiosity questioned, " Ramakrishna, do you worship the goddess faithfully?". To this Ramakrishna smiled and answered, " Yes, absolutely as the goddess looks after me and cares for me." The sage who now was enjoying the conversation carried on, " Have you ever seen her?". To this the innocent Ramakrishna answered, " No, I haven't been that lucky yet, but I am very much eager to see her. You think I can see her someday?" To this the sage replied, " Yes, why not? If you are really one of her great devotees then she will definitely meet you. But then you do have to prove it to her, impress her. Let me help you, here I will give you one mantra, this you should pray to her whole night. She will definitely appear before you. But mind you, don't you get scared with her ferocious looks."

Ramakrishna smiled to this and said eagerly, " No, I would never be afraid of the goddess as I worship her everyday." Smiling and satisfied with the answer, the sage guided Ramakrishna with the mantra that he needed to chant with full concentration and after blessing him left. Ramakrishna followed the sage's instructions and sincerely chanted the mantra with full concentration. He was so engrossed with the chanting that he didn't even realize that the night had passed and the sun had rose. Ramakrishna was abruptly disturbed by a sweet voice that was calling out to him. As Ramakrishna opened his eyes he was awestruck to see Goddess Kali standing in front of him in her glorious yet ferocious avatar. The young lad continued to look at the goddess dumbstruck. Then suddenly he started laughing out loudly. This made the goddess angry and ask, " What's wrong Raman, are you not afraid? To this Raman replied, " No Mother Goddess! How can I be afraid of you. When I worship you". Goddess Kali was amused by the answer," So, tell me Raman, why are you laughing?"

To this Raman fearlessly answered, " O Mother Goddess, when I first saw you I was impressed with your glorious avatar, but the thing that made me laugh is that though you have thousand faces, how come you have just two hands?" Goddess Kali looked amused and confused, to this Raman explained, " O Goddess, all I am saying is, see I have one nose and two hands, so when I catch a cold it still gets difficult for me to manage my running nose with both hands. You on the other hand have countless noses. I seriously wonder how you wipe and manage them with just two hands. Listen, Mother Goddess please don't get angry with me and curse me for this; but I seriously want to know." 

Goddess Kali was impressed with the child's vivid imagination and genuine curiosity. His innocence made her laugh. She said, " Ramakishna, I simply love your modesty, quick wittedness and imagination. So from now on, You will be known as Tenali Raman and I am making you a 'VIKATAKAVI'. With my blessing you shall be famous throughout the world and would be known as a witty and wise man. Go to Vijayanagar kingdom and meet King Krishnadevaraya." And by saying so, she blessed the lad and disappeared.

Young Ramakrishna was indeed very happy. He decided to follow the Goddess's advice and go to Vijayanagar Kingdom. Thus the young Tenali Raman started his long journey which finally changed his destiny.

Jataka Tales - The Story of the Clever Vaidya

Once upon a time, in a village named Chandrapur lived a hard working farmer named Mohan. Mohan was a young and kind person. He took care of his farm and the pair of bulls he had bought just the previous day from the cattle fair. He promised himself that he would feed them well only with fresh grass, bathe them and then take them to work on field. This would be his regular routine, A content man, Mohan would never miss his routine.

Next day, after finishing his work for the first half of the day, Mohan sat down under the tree for lunch. He and his bulls had worked hard for five hours and they needed a break. Content with his work he dozed off for a couple of hours unaware of the fact that he was been watched. A thief had been keeping an eye on Mohan since morning. He had been looking for an opportunity to get his hands on the bulls. The bulls would make him rich for a while, as selling them would fetch him a good price.

Seizing the opportunity, the thief tiptoed towards the bulls and led them away. But he hadn't got a bit far, when suddenly Mohan woke up. Shocked by what he saw, Mohan demanded angrily, "What do you think you are doing?"

The thief snapped back, "Who do you think you are to ask me this? These are my bulls and I can take them wherever I wish." Mohan was outraged by his answer but he was a smart man and couldn't be tricked easily. He held the thief's wrist and wouldn't let him go. 

The quarrel between them caught attention of farmers from the nearby fields. They all gathered around the two wondering what was going on. Since Mohan claimed that he had bought the bulls just the previous day and they had not seen him with them, the farmers couldn't take his side. This made Mohan unhappy. He wondered how this problem would resolve.

Finally one of the farmer suggested, "Let's take these bulls to our Vaidya. He is a wise man and can easily solve this problem." Agreeing with the suggestion made, the bulls were led to the local Vaidya. The Vaidya listened patiently to both the sides and then became quiet. Within minutes he knew what he had to do.

The Vaidya first turned to the thief and asked, "What did you feed the bulls?" Without any delay the thief replied, "Sir, I fed them boiled rice and two pumpkins!" Then the Vaidya asked the farmer, "And what about you?" The farmer said, "Vaidyaji, I fed them fresh grass!"

The Vaidya then went inside his house and came back with some liquid that he gave the bulls. Immediately the bulls threw up and wonder what came out - half digested grass! The Vaidya smiled and remarked, "So, now you know who the rightful owner is!" The farmer sighed in relief, took his bulls and went back home.

How Scorpions Can Survive Without Eating

Scorpions can face adverse situations and at times survive for months without food. Scorpions eat insects as food. When such situation occur, scorpions slow down their metabolism to one-third of its normal scale. With this routine they are able to use very little oxygen and can survive on just one insect a year.

This doesn't mean the scorpion can't spring up quickly enough in action on sight of it's food given hos low metabolism. Well no!! that's not the case. It still can hunt with the same zing as in normal circumstances.